Time and Culture

Been reading and watching a lot of history lately. John Adams on HBO. Looking in to my family's geneology. Reading the history of people in the distant past who may be my ancestors. It gets me thinking about society and culture, in a very human way. One example... people seemed much more dutifully respectful of their neighbors and spouses back then. But then, that would make sense. One relied on them, in a very tangible way. Today, we have the means to be "independent". But what does that mean for how we treat each other in our society? It seems the less we are dependent on one another, the less respectful we need to be of them. We have the "luxury" of choosing our relationships. But is that necessarily a good thing? Or does it isolate us? Would we be more appreciative and respectful of one another if we were more dependent on one another? If we truly needed one another, would the bonds be stronger? In so many ways I think today we feel so much less appreciative, and more isolated. I think, we do truly need one another. But our society has snowed us into believing we do not ... I think we have lost that primal sense of community. And I think we are paying a dear price for it, in ways we do not even fully comprehend.

If, lets say, a husband was chosen for us. And then we relied upon him for a roof over our head, food on our table. And he relied upon us to cook that food, for the clothes on his back. And this person was someone we worked side by side next to for years, simply to survive. And children came, whether we chose them or not. Would a bond form there, a love, an appreciation, that we cannot comprehend in our "independent" society? Was the dynamic so different as for us, standing in the culture we stand in, to be unable to understand it? Perhaps there were some who were miserable, and trapped. But in reading of the past, it seems to me there is evidence of a great deal of love and affection present in these histories. At the end of the day, there was no TV to zone out to, to distract them. They would have to entertain each other, and themselves. Did the physical labor and the peace of nature play a factor?

Perhaps it's a case of balance... the societies of the past faced hardships and challenges we do not. But inherent in those was a support system, a bonding culture. They had to make it work. Is there something about that that inherently supported success? And what of our culture today? Without dependence on one another, every relationship seems much more fragile. What is there to hold it together if a wrong move is made? We have a cornucopia of choice... in suitors, mates, employers, friends... so while on the one hand there is freedom, on the other, there is - what? No necessity to commit, or an ever present choice to commit or not. Well, that's not exactly the right phrasing... but I can't think of what it would be called. Or perhaps I am simply romanticing the past, in a search for the stability and constancy I long for.